Social Media Can Filter Only A Small Part of Motherhood

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Only on social media can I create the illusion that these precious boys are such well-behaved Angels 100% of the time. These pictures capture the beauty of childhood.  The truth is that only filters or the right angle of a picture will cover up my messy sheet on the bed, the pile of laundry in the corner and some dishes in the sink or hide the fact I just dealt with an hour long meltdown with my 6-year-old right before we snapped this shot

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The truth is that motherhood is friggin hard; It’s not always smiling and snuggles & in those hard moments, I felt alone for a long time. I compared myself to everyone, especially the “InstaMoms” that capture only the glitz and glamour of motherhood. I wanted to be the “old me” who felt good about herself. But then I realized I LOVED who I was evolving into through motherhood

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If your house doesn’t look like Pinterest, you’re still a good mom. And you are not failing because you didn’t get to make homemade lunches every day or because you didn’t send the kids to school in Cashmere sweaters. You are still a good mom. To our little ones, we’re the world; we are more than enough. And part of being a good mom is making sure you’re HAPPY because a happy mom makes a happy baby. 

 So as we honor the mothers in our lives this weekend, take a minute to realize what a badass mom YOU are.

If I’ve learned anything, it’s this belief that Mothers are the heart and soul in a family; If the heart isn’t taking care of herself than everything else will suffer.  So take the time to care for yourself. Take the idea of motherhood perfection and throw it out the window. Being in love with our children and feeling so grateful to be their parent can coexist with the reality that it’s also really, really hard. Allow yourself to be frustrated and “over the moon” in love with your child. Don’t shame yourself for having these feelings. It’s a reality. It’s a common theme that we all feel, but we don’t talk enough about. Take care of your mental health and don’t hold on to the guilt that comes naturally in the hard moments of parenting. In reality, we feel guilty because we love THAT much. Lean into that feeling. 

 

199e1fb32250bf0c455592a07c5feb15Different roads can lead to the same destination. We can parent 100 different ways & still raise happy, respectful, successful children. Don’t compare yourself to the InstaMoms. You keep rocking that messy hair bun, yoga pants and that heart of gold. You keep trying your best & keep doing what makes you happy so that you can keep shining and making this world a better place.

Wishing all of you wonderful and powerful women an (early) Happy Mothers Day!cropped-adamire2.jpg

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img_3689A day, a week plus one whole month dedicated to showing support for the millions that took their life to suicide. It’s the one month that brings awareness to the problem that 1 in 5 people deal with every day for the rest of their life; Mental Health and the fact it results so often in suicide.

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I’m grateful for this movement because doing something is better than nothing. But why don’t we raise awareness all year long? when did “serving & helping others” become a second/third/nineteenth priority to people. We declared a war on drugs and although there is debate whether that helped, it was a problem recognized on a national level; something everyone was involved in. That’s what we need with Mental Health and for suicide prevention.1925996346f46dfbd6186cc66aa35a41.jpg

When did “commit” suicide become a loosely used term? They didn’t commit suicide. The reality is someone took their life and suffered unimaginable pain in doing so.

It is no secret that Mental Health is my passion, but it’s also my biggest battle. Regardless, it’s in my bones & soul to feel compassion and deep empathy for the people who struggle with the will to live. I know I was given these struggles to contribute to the Mental HEALTH CRISIS that exists in America. Not enough psychiatrists, insurance doesn’t cover rehabilitation, psychiatric wards closing down in hospitals– the problem is growing, the solutions are decreasing and now it’s up to you, me, our society to raise awareness and do what we can to show we care; to make a change in someone’s life. If not in our time– let’s do it for our kids; the next generation!

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I had my own loved ones attempt suicide, a trauma I’ll never recover from. To imagine losing someone I loved was the greatest pain I’ve felt. To know I loved someone who was in that much pain that the world becomes so painful to live in & killing them self is the most realistic option at that point—- that feeling is something I can only imagine to be the equivalent of living in hell. A real life, living Hell. & yet every 16 minutes someone is in this living hell & attempts to take their life. What a sad reality we’re living in. But we can help! This month I’ll post a lot about Mental Health in an effort to bring awareness.

Today’s call to action:

If mental health wasn’t something you thought about– maybe because you never experienced it or didn’t know much about it– I challenge you to spend this month finding one way to contribute to this problem. Whether you learn, volunteer, or simply reach out and show someone you care; stop the stigma. Help be a big part of an important cause. You have the power to save a life with your words and actions; which are the superpowers we were given as humans.

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Let’s start by telling someone we care, today!

& Today, I’m bringing attention to the campaign I am super passionate about which is called imlistening.org 

They share the proof that Mental Health and Suicidal thoughts don’t discriminate. Anyone can fall into a Mental Health Illness or go through periods of suicidal thoughts. This organization interviews celebrities, athletes, singers & more who share their truth with the world and they allow you to share your story too. Check them out!

And below are resources from their site! Please repost them, share them, talk about them with people. Nobody needs to feel alone!


RESOURCES:

If you or anyone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts or any other type of crisis, you are not alone.

If the situation is potentially life-threatening, get immediate emergency assistance by calling 911 or the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (NSPL)
Phone: 1-800-273-8255

The Suicide Prevention Lifeline is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. This free and confidential service will provide crisis resources for you or your loved ones. Their website also offers a live chat for anyone in need.

Crisis Text Line (741-741)
TEXT: TALK to 741-741

The Crisis Text Line serves anyone, in any type of crisis, and it is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Their trained Crisis Counselors are available for coping with any painful emotion for which you need support.

Additional resources:

If you are seeking any form of assistance, the below list of resources can provide support or refer you to a local resource which can help.

The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP)
Phone: 1-888-333-2377

The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention raises awareness, funds research, and provides support and resources to those affected by suicide.

Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA)
Phone: 240-485-1001

For information on the symptoms, treatment, and prevention of anxiety and depression.

Concussion Legacy Foundation

Concussion and CTE Resources

Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance (DBSA)
Phone: 1-800-826-3632

For information and online or in-person support for those with bipolar disorder and depression.

Now Matters Now

Now Matters Now provides skills and support for coping with suicidal thoughts.

Psychology Today
Provides a national directory of therapists, psychiatrists, group therapy, and other options.

Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA)
Phone: 1-800-662-4357

Provides referrals to mental health care, substance abuse, and dual diagnosis treatment at a low cost/sliding scale.

Talkspace

Online, on-demand digital therapy.

The Trevor Project
1-866-488-7386

The Trevor Project provides confidential support for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning (LGBTQ) young people. Their phone hotline is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Veteran’s Crisis Line
1-800-273-8255
TEXT: 838255

The Veterans Crisis Line is available for veterans in crisis and their families and friends who are in need of support. Their hotline, text message service, and online chat are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week to provide confidential support to those facing a crisis.


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How YOU Can Save A Life— it’s easier than you think!

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Youtube: Learning to Love Yourself in 2018 (recap)

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Hey There Loves,

I’ve been deciding to switch up some of my blogging posts to vlogs. This was what a survey I posted back a while ago told me would be more helpful for people who didn’t always have time to read.

So here is a vlog with added thoughts and insights I’ve been using to Love Myself more in 2018. This goes back to my post: How to believe in yourself when nobody else does.

If you have a minute– Please help support the new channel I created on the large and in charge world of YOUTUBE. If you have one minute to spare–please drop a comment or subscribe to my page. It’d be much greatly appreciated! This new YouTube adventure is quite the change and challenge *hehe*.

Wishing you all the best, always. And don’t forget I’m here, as someone who relates, if you ever need anything. Carriedoran9@gmail.com 

Love you all.