I usually talk about the mind, the dreadful and wonderful parts of it that contribute to our life. I do that because our ideas become our reality. Suddenly our worst fears and most fascinating dreams become the moments we’re living in! Today especially, ’m finding myself reflecting on the reality of our lives, the moments that we surround yourself with people; how we all look, listen and feel things differently…I reflected on my reality and how learning the skills of mindfulness and self-awareness has helped me so much. It helped me understand how my perception of myself compared to the perception of others are all so very different. I reflected on how I should use these different perceptions for the positive. The person I am “believed to be” with my mom, dad, boss, brother, best friend or strangers are all going to be different and that’s sort of beautiful. They’re perceptions are built during different periods of my life, based off what I’ve shared, how I’ve acted, who they are shaping how they perceive me to be; utilizing my actions (my past and future). They’d all be different, and that’s totally okay I’m realizing. That’s actually pretty awesome. We have several different dynamics within us and together they create the beautiful uniqueness that makes up YOU. That makes up Me!
Am I a open book? Definitely not. Is anyone actually though? I don’t really think so.
I remember the saying, “ We’re like family!’, hinting that the family members are the only people who know the most about us, the real us. The bad things we did, our quirky favorite dinners or most annoying habits. Our awkward secrets we wouldn’t tell a friend. That’s all true stuff, but does our family know the real you, like we believe? The more and more I reflect on myself, I find that quote to be so off track. I personally don’t think that’s true for the majority of us. I think I know the real me. You know the real you. I write my story from a first-person perspective and nobody can truly know or argue any better.
One person may know all your secrets, but are they the friendly employee whose always greeting and helping you? Maybe. Maybe not. Our family may be the people or person who knows your life situations and where you came from, but isn’t our friends people who we can easily talk about our goals, aspirations and failures with?
We can be so many things and I think if you can master the skill of awareness, than you are truly the only person who knows everything about you. You make your story and tell your tale. There may be some truths to what others know about you and what others say about you, but there is also a lot of your story that only you know.
On my most darkest day, it’s me that pulls me out. It’s me that has to create the positive thoughts and mindset to get through that day. Any given day is a blessing only because it’s not promised. Even on my happiest days, I don’t share every small seamless detail with my husband. So, when I was able to gain my perception of self awareness, I realized how much power over my life I had. What I can control is what I should put my best self towards. Perceptions and descriptions of my life from others leave me very little room to control or change anything so anytime wasted on that is a misfortune for me. Instead of worrying myself sick, I can be real with myself and own up to the failed adventures I made and all the great, creative details that make up me entirely.
From the morning when I wake myself up, I make decision after decision. This is part of my story. The phone calls on lunch break, the cool conversations with guests or co-workers, the argument with a family member or the moments of laughter with another family member, the consistent texting with friends all make up me, the different sides I have. They make up the different colors of me, the different layers to me, the things that make me a capable, caring human being. Capable and caring aren’t including “perfect”, although people often mistake you’re intentions and personality characteristics. This caring and capable personality doesn’t mean the best, the most important, the “got it the most together” girl or any other misconceptions. I simply look at my story like I’m the author of every chapter, every paragraph and every word. That means every person I choose, every decision or thought I make or don’t make. These colors, these traits is my perception and that’s so important to understanding self-worth and self-esteem. The importance of knowing who you are all came to me from the beauty of this bouquet of flowers I got my cousin for Mother’s Day.
I realized when someone points out my flaws, they could be right. When someone gives me a compliment, it may be accurate. When I reflect back on a situation, I have to be willing to say “dang, you didn’t handle that as great; better luck next time”. I don’t know everything, I never will and I doubt one person I know does. What I am confident in is the fact that you are unique, you are the reason you should care, change or have passion towards something. If you remember you are the author of your story, than you’ll own every different side of you that you have. You’ll feel confident in the weaknesses you’ve polished into positive traits or you’ll own the muddy waters you walked in to make mistakes turn into lessons learned.
I don’t live in a white castle on top of the hill, referencing that I don’t have my shit together (being completely transparent). I didn’t come from a family of perfection. I’ve felt rejected, misunderstood and hurt just like some of you. I’ve had people who know one side of me and paint my story as if they have all the details that describe my life. It’s a natural habit to follow your gut. I do it all the time. I follow my gut in real life situations to decide what to eat for lunch or who to keep in my circle of trusted friends.
My gut tells me that we wouldn’t be who we are if we didn’t have these different sides of us. I wouldn’t be me if all the colors in my world were the same. You can be consistent, life isn’t though. Trust in yourself enough to know your worth, keep a strong self-esteem & trust in your gut. Take the day as if you chose it and you’re deciding to live it. And after you start living and making the most of everyday. Join me as I make the most of 2018. It’s been a roller-coaster of a year, but it’s all teaching me little by little that I’m a wonderful contribution to this world JUST. LIKE. YOU!
You’re going to make mistakes, mess up or could’ve done better. You’ll also have days you conquered, loved or couldn’t have done worst. I hope that you just realize how unique and important you are to your own story. I got to finally understanding that perceptions from others can’t be your problem. You solve your problems, you get to chose your problems. You make your life cool because you design the rules. I am not sure how the unique, baby flower about to blossom like all the others, reminded me how it’s no less important or beautiful than the others. It’s just making its mark among the other flowers. It’s contributing to the beauty of the whole house because of this simple random, bouquet full of colors.
Just like you. And me. And us. Let’s learn together to be so proud of what we accomplish and master the skill of learning from failures. Conquer the world with a positive loving mindset and what can stand against you?